I am not a fan of horror movies, but earlier today I watched what turned out to be the scariest movie I have ever seen:  Father of the Bride.  Not the original 1950 film with Spencer Tracy, Joan Bennett, and Elizabeth Taylor, but the 1991 remake with Steve Martin.  Although I had seen the film many times before, it wasn't until today that a tremendous fear settled over me, like hearing Jack Nicholson say, "Here's Johnny!" as he breaks down a door with an axe in The Shining.

My little girl will turn eleven soon.  Her mom and I spent the first five years of her life fighting over her before we realized how futile our battles were.  We were so concerned with our own agendas that we were missing out on just being Mom and Dad, sharing our daughter as she grew older.

My daughter and I have a bedtime ritual.  When it's time to turn in, she asks me, "Camel ride?"  That's where I get on my hands and knees, get mounted like a camel, and she slaps my rear end and says, "Hut hut."  I then slowly, arthritically, transport her to her bedroom as our unreasonably large German Shepherd follows.  But just last night my former wife emailed me a picture of our daughter on top of an actual camel at the fair taken just hours earlier.  "Finally, a real camel ride," I thought to myself.  I missed the fair because I was working, but at least I got to see my kid smiling atop an actual camel.

So as I'm watching Father of the Bride, I realized just how quickly our little girl is growing up.  It won't be too long before I'm in Steve Martin's position, when my kid comes home one day and says, "Daddy, I've met someone and we want to get married!"  I'm saving an expensive bottle of Scotch for that day.  Please excuse my language, but it quite frankly scares the shit out of me.

When parents are constantly battling each other over their children, they are missing out on the joys of being parents.  Trust me, there will come a day when you will look back and ask, "Where did the time go?"  You will remember the court hearings, depositions, and (probably) large unpaid bills for attorney's fees, but you won't be able to remember your child's first sleepover with a friend or the songs your child sang in a school play.  Why not?  Because litigation takes your focus off your child and puts it on the court process.

Don't miss out on the best years of your life by fighting pointless court battles over your kids.  Take your time and choose a child-focused family lawyer to help you resolve your conflicts and get on with being a good co-parent.